I am so full. I feel bloated and weighed down, yet I keep on eating. A handful of bean chips, the leftover broccoli, two slices of gluten-free pizza, a protein shake, etc. This was all after having a nice dinner of delicious homemade tacos. I am so full. What the heck?
Rewind 72 hours. I had the privilege of having my nephew come stay with us for the weekend. The whole weekend. He’s 4. And incredibly active. I spent all day Friday prepping food (and my house), as he has a few allergies and food sensitivities.
My house is generally one of the neighborhood hangout spots (WHICH I LOVE), but I realized it’s quite different to have extra kids in and out all day and to have an extra one ALL weekend.
My older two children were really helpful in the entertaining and “sit down with us to eat” departments, but there was still much to do between my nephew and my own soon-to-be one-year-old baby boy.
I think I ran the dishwasher two or three times per day, picked up the living room (and entry way and mud room and library) every couple hours. There was more than one article of clothing in my front lawn (slip-n-slide?) and shoes everywhere. I would have just left it all until today, but then my baby would have gotten into everything and ended up eating more cat food or dirty socks or something he wasn’t supposed to have. I felt like I was trying to herd cats all weekend. Have you ever felt that way?
Fun memories were made at the park, on the slip-n-slide, at the dinner table, and before bed-time, but oh, I’m thankful I have a few years to go before I’m in the middle of the toddler energy zone again.
Fast forward 72 hours.
Once my house was quiet and the kids helped me dig-out of the pit for the 13th time, I checked in with my own self to see how I was doing. The first thing I noticed after recognizing sheer exhaustion was my bloated stomach. I may not have noticed it over the tiredness, but what nagged at me was that I kept on looking for food even though I was so full.
So, I did a little inventory on the weekend:
Drank plenty of water CHECK
Ate healthy food CHECK, well, mostly check, I just ate way too much
Exercised NOPE- no time (that’s what I told myself, anyway)
Quiet time DOUBLE NOPE- have you been reading any of this blog post?!
Ok, so I think I pin-pointed the culprit(s).
I was TIRED. I mean really tired. Especially today. It hit me once I sat down in the quiet.
I think I started over-eating yesterday as a way to manage the chaos. I told myself that I didn't have time to eat mindfully. When I don’t give it up to God, my desire for control can be a problem. Then I think I continued over-eating today as a pick-me-up. And now, here I am, full and bloated and feeling bummed that I made these choices this weekend.
One could say that I didn’t have a choice to do anything differently given my circumstances—it was chaos! One could say ‘oh well, what’s one weekend? Next week will be better.’ One could say I’m being too hard on myself.
I have been a personal trainer for over 12 years and I have heard all the excuses. I know exactly where they lead. Excuses are a slippery slope that leads to declining health.
The truth is I know better. I could have asked for more help and made time to exercise and rest more and ask God to deal with my control issues. I just wasn’t mentally prepared.
And I was really tempted to write about something else today. Some other topic. Something less vulnerable. But it is my deep desire that if you find yourself with these same or similar eating or exercise struggles, you will take some time and examine the root causes and tackle them. I encourage you to invite God into your struggle.
I am the big proponent of making wise choices in spite of—especially during-- challenging circumstances. Whenever I don’t think I have the time to do something, that’s exactly when I do it. For example, if I’m running out the door and I notice a dirty baby bottle sitting on the counter, I take the time to wash it out. I know it seems like a small thing, but I am certain I have 24 hours in the day and I choose not to say “I don’t have time.” I will make time for my priorities. Tools like an accountability partner and a Wellness Journal are so important for me.
We are worth feeling our best, as often as possible. Your physical body is priceless. So is mine.
We have so much that we can’t control with our health, in our genes, and in our circumstances, but I believe that for every one thing we can’t control, there are a dozen things we can affect, positively.
This encouraging video I made several years ago for the Living Wellness Growth Group program speaks to the topic of rough circumstances. Watch it here.
Friends, I’d love to hear how you deal with chaos. Leave me a comment and share with our readers how you manage the unexpected chaos of life, however beautiful.
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Disclaimer: This article is not intended to diagnose or treat any illnesses or disease. Please always check with your doctor before beginning any new nutritional or fitness program or before making any nutritional/fitness changes.